Career Goers of Tomorrow
by GYRAX
Summary: Naru has brutality. Keitaro has invulnerability. I have a list of TEN careers in which they can use their abilities productively. That's right a new installment is up, which means I have MORE careers. Not really a pairing as much as it is an experiment.
1. Career Goers of Tomorrow

Note: I do not own Love Hina or any other intellectual properties. They are all copyrights of their respectful owners. The rest, however, is MINE, BEE-YOTCHES!

Naru has brutality. Keitaro has invulnerability. I have a list of ways they can use their abilities productively.

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GYRAX Presents… 

_Career Goers of Tomorrow_

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Use 1

It was a big game at some random stadium in Japan. It was a tie between the Volcanoes, a random team, and the Tsunamis, a random team with Naru and Keitaro at the lineup.

A voice can be heard from all over the stadium. "Next up is our most promising player, Naru Narusegawa!"

Before Naru walked out of the dugout, she looked back at the team's random coach. "Hey, Coach. I'm going to use my lucky bat, if you don't mind."

With that, Naru walked out of the dugout, and towards Keitaro.

The ronin stood still, with his arms stiff, and his right hand overlapping his left. He had a grim look on his face. "Why did I agree to do this?"

Without missing a beat, Naru responded. "Because I'm giving you half my salary." She picked Keitaro up by his ankles and dragged him to home plate.

When the random pitcher saw what was in front of him, he was a mix of shocked and confused. Naru was holding Keitaro up like he was a baseball bat. Then he noticed a Post-It™ note on Keitaro's baseball helmet. It said "Hi! I'm Naru Narusegawa's lucky bat. Don't mind me. Just pitch, dammit! –Keitaro Urashima".

He decided to go for it and pitched. Naru responded with one good swing and…

**SMACK!** Keitaro's forehead was nice and hard enough to send the ball flying out of the ballpark, as well as the earth's gravitational pull.

And a random player at the dugout said out loud "I swear to God, she's not on steroids."

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Use 2 

Gazth-Sonika is a country torn apart in civil war.

A jeep drives over a dirt path. Sitting in the back were Privates Naru Narusegawa and Keitaro Urashima.

The jeep stops in its tracks, and the sergeant driving it turns to Naru and Keitaro.

"What's going on?" Keitaro asked.

"Just in case you forgot, I'll reiterate your mission objective." He turns to Naru. "Narusegawa. You light your boyfriend on fire. Then you are to throw him about 4 kilometers straight ahead. If your aim is good enough, he should hit a Galza weapons depot, resulting in its complete destruction. Should you succeed, we'll land a crippling blow to the rebel army."

"Now wait a second, here!" Keitaro interjected. "Can't we just reconsider?"

Naru take out a lighter and sets Keitaro ablaze! "Don't breathe, Keitaro. Your lungs will catch fire."

Keitaro was burning bright like a campfire. The sergeant looked at the flaming ronin. "Remember. You're burning alive in the name of our most noble leader, Korslan IV."

Keitaro thought sarcastically, _Wow. That makes me feel a whole lot better._

With one mighty toss, Naru launched Keitaro into the sky. Her aim was dead on as he flew through a window on the Galza weapons depot. It only had to take a few seconds until…

**BOOOOOOOOOOM!** There goes the weapons depot. The explosion catapulted Keitaro into the sky. The good news is that Keitaro is no longer on fire.

Before Madlax was going to partake in some random mission, she paused and saw the ronin flying across the jungle. A moment of silence ensues. "I think I'll have shrimp fettuccine for dinner." Pause. "Yeah. I'll have shrimp fettuccine for dinner."

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Use 3 

The arch bridge Naru and Keitaro were standing on top of was really high up. Keitaro was tied to a bungee cable, as both of them stood at the edge of the bridge.

Naru turns to Keitaro. "You ready for this?"

"No! What the hell were you thinking when you enlisted me as a 'Bungee Cord Dummy'?"

"You're used to it." She turns to her left and sees a random bungee cord tester. "All right, Ed! We're ready!"

"No, we're not!" Naru booted the ronin off the bridge. Now he was screaming his head off. "UUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I already said he was screaming his head off, dammit! Anyway, just as he was closing in on the ground below, the bungee cord tied to him began to stretch. He looked up with glee. "LOOK, NARU! THE CORD IS ACTUALLY…"

**SLAM!** He left a mighty big impression on the ground, too… like Wile E. Coyote.

Naru looked at the sight below and turned to the random bungee cord tester. "Alright, Ed! Shorten it up a bit!"

Keitaro was now being raised from the ground, and needless to say, he was in a lot of pain. "Ow! Dammit! That hurt! Stupid bungee cord!"

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Use 4 

"Hi, Seta." Keitaro said, approaching him. Apparently, they were in another excavation of some kind. This time, they're in the U.K.

"I heard of a civilization that used to be ran by man-eating bunny rabbits here in England, so I went to investigate." Seta was digging a tunnel underground.

"Man-eating rabbits? Why does that sound familiar?" The ronin asked himself.

"I was going to ask the same thing." Seta replied.

"By the way, I got us some assistance." Keitaro said. He looked behind him. "Hey, Naru! We're down here!"

You see Naru walk down the tunnel with a hard hat on her head. "I'm here." She approached the tunnel.

"What's Naru doing here?" Seta asked his apprentice.

"Well, she just got her digger's license. This is her first assignment." Keitaro responded.

"Here right?" Naru asked, pointing where the tunnel ended.

"Yep." The ronin replied.

Naru winds up and punched the dirt wall where the tunnel ended and a cloud of dust covered the entire excavation.

A minute passes and the dust finally settles. When it does, you see an extra few hundred meters of tunnel, and Naru standing at what looked like an ancient door at the end.

Needless to say, Seta was impressed. "That's a neat trick, Naru."

"Thanks." She replied. She looks at the ancient door. "So this is supposed to be…"

**CRASH! **A pile of dirt falls on Naru, burying her alive.

"Holy crap!" Keitaro quickly runs to Naru, with Seta following. They, too end up buried under a pile of dirt.

All Keitaro said afterwards was, "Wow. This sucks."

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Use 5 

Los Angeles, California.

It was 1900 hours; 3 hours after a hostage situation began. A group of four armed suspects were holding a supermarket full of people hostage; they were armed and dangerous. Their demand was $100,000 and a gift certificate to Circuit City for each of them.

The LAPD's local SWAT Team was preparing for to raid the supermarket and proceed with rescuing the hostages. Among this team were officers Naru Narusegawa and Keitaro Urashima. The team approached the supermarket with utmost caution. Then the team leader threw a teargas grenade into the supermarket, with another SWAT officer motioning his left hand to storm the place. Naru held Keitaro in front of her like a human shield as she followed the rest of the team in.

There was gunfire everywhere; bullets were deflecting off Keitaro's skin. "OUCH! THOSE BULLETS HURT, DAMMIT!"

By the time the smoke cleared, Naru and Keitaro had their MP5 sub-machine guns at the suspects. Upon a closer look, they find out the suspects already got away, and these were straw dummies with pictures of their faces on them.

"I feel silly." Naru replied.

The good news was that all the hostages were rescued. Three weeks later, the very same suspects were pulling off another supermarket takeover, but were apprehended at the crime scene.

End _Career Goers of Tomorrow_

I hope you enjoyed this piece of creativity. Now go and review!

-GYRAX  



	2. Career Goers of Tomorrow II

Note: I do not own Love Hina or any other intellectual properties. They are all copyrights of their respectful owners. The rest, however, is MINE, BEE-YOTCHES!

Naru has brutality. Keitaro has invulnerability. I have a NEW list of ways they can use their abilities productively.

That's right! This is a new installment of one of the most innovative Love Hina fan fictions out there!

Another Note: Don't forget to read encyser's _Career Goers Ni No Tachi_ for me ok? You can find it in my "Favorite Stories" list. Thanks!

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GYRAX Presents… 

_Career Goers of Tomorrow II: El Sequel_

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Use 6 

The Olympic games were always something to behold. The glory. The competition. The majesty. The impending chaos is to befall one of the events.

The javelin throw is an integral sport in the Summer Olympics. Naru is just about to have her turn; Keitaro was standing next to her, as she was ready for her throw.

She saw the javelin in front of her, and then she picked up Keitaro. She threw him clear out of the stadium. The audience was in total shock as the ronin was no longer in sight. He then came back from orbit and crashes back into the stadium in front of Naru.

After a few flinches and a twitch, the referee went to measure the distance between Naru and Keitaro. "Total distance… TWO METERS!"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT?" She went over and gave Keitaro a flip kick, sending him back to orbit. "THIS WAS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

"Erm…" The referee said. "You're supposed to THROW the javelin."

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Use 7 

Naru was dressed in guerrilla warfare gear as she was navigating a dense jungle somewhere in the Amazon. She had a disk with her, and she didn't intend on letting it go. Suddenly, a huge man in Military gear popped out of the shrubbery and right in front of her.

"Who the hell are you?" Naru shouted.

"I am Hans Gelegentlicherkräftigerkerl! I am a mercenary hired to retrieve that reconnaissance data you stole from us!" He spoke in a god-awful supposed to be Eastern European accent.

"I'm never giving you this in 14,292 years! You can forget it!" She had her fist ready for a punch.

"CUT!" A voice yelled out. It turns out the Amazon jungle was just an indoors setting in a movie studio. The set was gorgeous; it bled authenticity. The burly mercenary was actually some overpaid Hollywood douche-bag (I think his name was Harold Swollenpecker.).

The director picked up the megaphone again. "That was great! Harold, you can go back to your trailer. BRING OUT THE STUNT DOUBLE!"

And that's when Keitaro came to the set, dressed in the same military gear as the actor. He stood within a few feet of Naru.

"Alright, Urashima!" The director said. "Now, Narusegawa's going to punch you clear out of the Amazon jungle, got it?"

Keitaro just nodded, a little irritated at the fact that he's just being a punching bag, and that the director hasn't addressed him by an honorific; if you don't have an intimate relationship with a Japanese, that can be considered an insult. He was ready for the punch.

Then, some idiot cameraman went out and had the audacity to say, "He told me he likes your panties!" Then he said to himself, "That should make things more interesting."

"I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!" Keitaro snapped back.

"AND ACTION!"

And in that instant, Naru socked Keitaro in the left eye-socket, having him bounce wildly through the studio like he was in a pinball machine.

Everyone struggled to take cover. "HIT THE DECK!" Keitaro bounced all over the studio walls and eventually collided with Naru, sending her out through the studio door and out of the studio; she smashed into the wall of another studio next door. She fell on the floor twitching. Then a blind hobo peed on her.

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Use 8 

A typhoon has just hit the eastern shores of Japan. Wind was blowing; Volvos were flying around, smashing people (How a bunch of Swedish manufactured station wagons got to Japan, I don't know.), and a woman was trapped in the flooded waters. Enter a coast guard helicopter; Naru and Keitaro were standing in the chopper, with Keitaro in a harness tied to a rope.

"Ready for this, Keitaro?" Naru said. "Remember, lives depend on you, now."

"Yeah, I guess." Keitaro responded.

Naru booted him to the torrential waters. The woman saw him and she didn't hesitate to grab on to his harness. Keitaro waved to Naru, indicating that the woman is safe. Naru jerked the rope, but she yanked it too hard because they were heading towards the spinning helicopter blades.

"SHIT!" Naru pulled the rope down to avert them from the blades, but they were now on a collision course with a nearby house. The woman was safe, because it was Keitaro that broke her fall as they crashed into the dining room, where an old man was still eating his tuna sandwich.

"Whoops!" Naru said as she pulled the rope up, pulling them towards her. As they both got in the chopper, Naru turned to the shaken woman. "Are you ok, Miss…"

"MY HUSBAND'S STILL DOWN THERE!"

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Use 9 

The Tokyo Zoo is at a crisis. One of the zookeepers secretly released a Burmese Tiger, and now the animal is at large. The tiger went on a disoriented rampage throughout the city, not having a single clue of what's around him.

Enter Animal Control. Two unique officers, Naru Narusegawa and Keitaro Urashima respectively, were sent to take care of the problem.

Naru had Keitaro's ankles tied to a rope. "Keitaro? You ready?"

"Am I ever?" He responded. With that, Naru threw him with all her might. Keitaro was now rocketing across the city, looking for the tiger, until he found it right in front of him. He attempted to grab it, but he instead flew past him at an alarming speed; too fast for a successful grab.

Naru noticed the rope falling to the floor and pulled out a walkie-talkie. "Keitaro? Did you get it? Over."

Keitaro's responded. "No, but I have comedian Dave Attell. Is that good enough? Over."

"THAT'S A DUMB-ASS QUESTION! Over."

And it wasn't until three-and-a-half hours and two members of the Red Hot Chili Peppers later until they finally brought the animal back into captivity.

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Use 10 

After three days of protests from a group of people bent on preserving old buildings, Naru and Keitaro are finally ready to demolish the Shirow Masamune Hotel, a fifteen story building that existed in Hinata for more than fifty years.

Keitaro was wearing a harness attached to a long chain, and at the end of that chain was Naru, holding on to it ready to swing. She spun around in circles, the chain swinging around her, and Keitaro screaming something about hordes of Cacodemons. Then, Naru swung Keitaro at the old building, completely smashing the first story. That caused a chain reaction causing the entire structure to collapse in on itself. Apparently, Naru wasn't far enough away from the collapsing building, as the dust and debris completely swept her away. "WAAAAAAARGH!"

Later, she emerged completely covered in dirt. Apparently, she forgot about Keitaro, as he came down to Earth, hitting a car's trunk and causing it to flip upwards and smash him. The car then exploded and sent him to the sewers where he was chewed up and spit back out by an alligator (God knows how one got there in the first place.).

End _Career Goers of Tomorrow II_

I hope you enjoyed this piece of creativity. Now go and review!

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If you want to see more of Naru and Keitaro in the workplace, then there's good news. I'm working on a full multi-chapter fic, which the twosome is enlisted in the British Library special Operations Unit, or DIET, called _Love or Die Hina_. There's also encyser's spin-off fic _Career Goers Ni No Tachi_, which you need to read (it's in my "Favorite Stories" list in my profile.). I'm also planning on writing ANOTHER daughter fic to this one where Keitaro is the captain of a pirate ship; it's a slight parody of _One Piece_ and all the Hinata Girls will be involved in some serious pirate action. 

Coming Soon…

_Make It in ONE PIECE, Keitaro!_

Also, if you want to see another chapter of _Career Goers of Tomorrow_, tell me! I'll be sure to put on my thinking cap and come up with five more careers.

GYRAX


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